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The Runaway Ego

I awaken each day to a pointed quote from my revered teacher don Miguel Ruiz. As I focus on the quote from the perspective of dreaming, the Toltec word for meditation with intent, clarity increases. Here is the link today March 7, 2022.


“The outside dream reflects our personal dream; it will justify every belief.”


Then I ask myself … what does this mean to me.


I am sharing today’s answer below.


In the beginning of my personal evolution, I saw myself as being smart, smarter than most people…after all, I won awards from the 2nd grade spelling bee, to winning poetry writing and reading rewards in Elementary School, to lead acting parts in plays in Middle and High School, the Outstanding Student Award for my Masters degree in Mental Health And School Counseling in Graduate School. Then I encountered The Four Agreements where I learned that being smart was not the path to happiness; wisdom played a much bigger part in alleviating suffering.


Miguel says many times … Don’t believe me, don’t believe anybody, and above all don’t believe the thoughts in your head. When we believe ourselves, we make ourselves right which often ends in action, reinforcing the belief in our subconscious mind. The irony is that the belief did not originate with us, but was acquired through Domestication originating at birth, or perhaps prebirth, to age 7. Uncovering beliefs is a result of making new agreements as described in the Four/Five Agreements.


… Take a breath and connect to a belief you hold and trace its origin to your family’s lineage, your hometown, the prevailing belief in your hometown, and even to the prevailing belief on Earth at the time …


The over blown Ego, in simple terms, is defined as thinking you are the smartest person on earth. (Psychology, Freudian) This most central part of the mind, which accesses and interprets external surroundings has been recently playing out on the world stage in characters such as Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin. The traits of these quintessential narcissists include a propensity to lie, paranoid orientation, scapegoating, perceiving oneself as a victim, unconstrained aggression, insecurity underlying grandiosity, and troubled relationships full of drama, and are all reflections of the Ego.



I have experienced versions of the runaway ego, in the Narcissist/Enabler Relationships of my past. My soft-hearted kindness, empathy and compassion coupled with low self-esteem and an avoidance of arguing (which reminded me of my parent’s relationship), rendered me easy prey for the Narcissist. Now, armed with new agreements, inspired by The Four Agreements, studying how to talk so people will listen, a deepening experience of self-love and self-acceptance, and an awareness of Oneness (the unity of all life), I have learned not only how to live as an artist of the spirit, but to spot those who do not walk their talk. I have also learned that those who are the most ego driven are the most fearful, driven by what the Toltecs refer to as the Parasite in the mind.



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